The Reset Loop Behind Overdrinking
Hey, everybody. Welcome back. Today, I wanna start with something that might sound a little bit strange at first. What if the thing that is keeping you stuck isn't just alcohol or the drinks? What if part of that hook is the whole cycle around the alcohol and the drinks?
Speaker 1:And when I say cycle, I mean the cycle of overdoing it, then the next day regret, that reset that you have, maybe clean eating and working out and that feeling that I'm back, you know, kind of feeling. And then you kind of slowly drift right back into that same pattern. And I don't think this is true for everybody, but for a lot of high functioning people, people who still show up, still perform, still get things done, there's this rhythm that develops. The fall off, the feel bad, the recommit, feel strong again, and then repeat. And after a while, that whole cycle, it kind of starts to feel normal, maybe even productive.
Speaker 1:So if any of that rang true for you, that's what I'm going to dig into today. That reset feels like true progress, but sometimes it's just the other side of the same pattern. And here's what makes it hard to see. Sometimes that reset feels so good because the crash felt so bad. The contrast is actually doing some of the work.
Speaker 1:And if you're someone like me who likes achievement, intensity, maybe a comeback story, and a lot of people listening to this are exactly this person, the reset starts to feel strangely satisfying. You get to prove something to yourself again. You get to become that person who pulled it back together. And this is where it can get tricky, especially for high performers because you're really good at recovering. It's easy to tell yourself, hey.
Speaker 1:This pattern that I'm in, I'm gonna get out of it, and it's not really in the moment costing me that much. And that's one of the pitfalls. A lot of people stay stuck because their life, it's not falling apart. They stay stuck because they're good at pulling it back together. Sit with that one.
Speaker 1:When you're functional, the consequences, they're pretty easy to explain away. You know? I still got my workout in. I still got up. I still showed up.
Speaker 1:I still handled the kids. And while that might all be true, the better question, however, is how much of your energy is going towards recovering from something that you could have prevented? How many Mondays are you spending climbing back to the baseline instead of actually moving forward? Now I'm not saying that as a shame question. It's just one to get honest on.
Speaker 1:And this isn't all about alcohol either. You see this pattern everywhere in work, in fitness, in food, relationships even. Some people push hard, then they crash, they recover, and then they call the recovery growth. Sometimes it is, and sometimes it's just that familiar loop. And I've noticed this in my own life, not just with alcohol, with work, with my ambitions, with even fitness at times.
Speaker 1:There's a part of me that really gets comfortable pushing hard and overdoing it and then pulling myself back together. And the pullback, it does feel productive. It feels like I'm being disciplined. Like, okay, I am the kind of person who can take this hit and come back. But at some point, I had to ask, am I actually growing here or am I just getting really good at recovering from the same pattern?
Speaker 1:Because there's a real identity that forms around this. That identity feels strong, but it keeps us close to this edge because the comeback story always needs something to come back from. This is also why a steady, normal, even keel life can feel weird at first when you make these changes. When you remove this chaos, you don't just lose the bad part. You lose the drama, the intensity, the emotional contrast, and even that rush of getting to prove yourself again.
Speaker 1:And that can make a calm life feel boring or flat or maybe like something underneath is wrong. And I think that's why a lot of people have these good streaks, and then they feel strange and pull back to the old pattern. It's not like they want these consequences, but if you've lived that up and down pattern long enough, that steady can feel off and really strange, and I've experienced this myself. Almost like something is missing, you know, you can't put your finger on even though things are much better. And even that calm can go as far as to you're asking yourself, wait, is this it?
Speaker 1:And that's where people accidentally kind of recreate this chaos. They maybe loosen the rules or stop checking in, maybe just even tell themselves, hey, I'm fine. I don't need to be so stringent on myself because they also know that they get to reset. They get to clean the slate, which gives that hit of that rush of becoming better again. But the deeper goal is not to get better at resetting.
Speaker 1:The deeper goal is to need fewer of these resets. Now I want to say there's nothing wrong with resetting. We all need them. Life happens. But there's a difference between using a reset when you need one and making the reset your whole entire system.
Speaker 1:So I wanna go over a few things that can help. Number one is map the cycle without shame. Just curiosity. When do you feel the most in control? When do rules maybe start to loosen?
Speaker 1:What emotion usually comes up right before overdoing it? Was it stress, maybe boredom, loneliness, pressure, or maybe you just needed to check out? And then the deeper question, what do you actually get from the reset afterwards? That one can be uncomfortable because the answer might be, I get to feel disciplined again. I get to feel like I'm improving.
Speaker 1:I get to become the comeback version of myself. That's useful to know because if you only look at the drinking, you might be missing half the pattern. Alright. Second thing is reduce the size of these swings. You don't need to fix everything overnight.
Speaker 1:Just make the lows less low. Plan a lower drink night before the night starts. Alternate drinks. Use Sunnyside, of course, before you already are in that moment, and then ask one question like, what kind of morning am I choosing right now? And that's going to help pull you out of this short term and makes the future version of you part of the decision in the now.
Speaker 1:And then third, learn to tolerate steady. This sounds easy, but it actually can be hard. If you're used to highs and lows, steady can feel like nothing is happening. But something is. You're building trust in yourself.
Speaker 1:You're proving the progress doesn't have to come from pain. You may have to learn how to feel proud of these steady nights instead of one dramatic reset. And yes, consistency can feel less exciting at first, but over time, it creates something different. Not the rush of, yes, I'm back. More like this quiet confidence of, I'm still here, and I'm comfortable being myself.
Speaker 1:I think this is hard for a lot of people because the reset can make us feel like we're doing so much of this work, and sometimes we are. But sometimes we're just repeating the same job over again. So this week, don't just ask how much I drink. Ask what cycle you're in. Are you building a life that you enjoy being present for, or are you building a life that you have to keep recovering from?
Speaker 1:I think we can all agree that the goal isn't to get better at starting over. The actual goal is to build something that you don't have to keep starting over from, and that means one less reset at a time. Okay. That's it for this week. Thanks for hanging out with me.
Speaker 1:If you got anything out of this, please rate and review. Of course, email me, [email protected]. Thank you to everybody that's reached out. I really do appreciate it, and I truly do love hearing from you. Okay.
Speaker 1:That's it. And until next time, cheers to your mindful drinking journey.
Creators and Guests
